Sunday, April 21, 2013

Big stan 2007

Once upon a time, there lived a tiny, insecure man who learned the only way he could make his enormous ego feel comfortable in his teeny, tiny body was to embarrass, humiliate, and torture others. He thought he was a master of disguise, fooling others into believing he was a big man. Yet he was only fooling himself, and through time his unconscionable behavior repulsed and repelled everyone. If his heart was three or three-hundred sizes too small, it didn't matter by then because no one was around to even care...


This is me, I just read this summary and it is not much of a summary at all let me go get something better.

A weak con man panics when he learns he's going to prison for fraud. He hires a mysterious martial arts guru who helps transform him into a martial arts expert who can fight off inmates who want to hurt or love him.


This is me, yes. Yes I like this movie. It's toilet humor with a positive message.


It is 230 afternoon on Saturday and I've come up to my room to spin some energy. Cheryl said you could use some entertainment something and nothing better to do with my time and puts McCain together the young man.


This may sound a little weird, I think eyes talked about this before, the way my mind works is that I can like a mother characters. Sometimes… Sometimes when I'm at work I'm Gil Grissom and CSI trying to investigate a mystery. When I meditate, I become Eckart Tolle
  that little German man with the big nostrils. And when I read my books, I become the characters in those books. Right now I'm reading Woo,
 a series written and released through Kindle. It was never a real book. I spend a lot of my time pretending I'm one of the characters in the story. This pretending is something that I've done my whole life. I spent a lot of time by myself. I was only child for 12 years. I had working parents. So entertain myself, I set from the TV until I was inspired to create a game to play in my mind.


I'm getting to know a lot of characters, literal characters, on You Tube. There are weird and crazy and funny and lovable people on YouTube. YouTube is better than any encyclopedia. Better than any university. Better than any magazine. Better than the TV station. YouTube is unique unto itself. YouTube is for passive observers like myself what Facebook is to social people. It's something the Internet has bought rock that is unique. It never would've happened without the Internet. And there is someone John, that you have to meet. If Elliott Hurley doesn't ignight a spark inside of you,  your fuse is wet.............This guy is crazy. Crazy in a great way. We were all crazy. I think everybody should catch Elliott Hurley's craziness. I have Cheryl listening to Elliott's YouTube post called rat race. I have are listing for two reasons. One, is whether or not it's a good thing for you to look at. I want know she agrees it is something that you would benefit from listening to. Second Cheryl has dreams too. She needs inspiration to. And Dragon that's the wrong kind of 'to', I'm talking about also.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cf3R3yzEn94


How To Escape The Rat Race (create a non-job)



So either use the link on your web explorer or by putting the title in YouTube and go there and take a 20 minutes to listen.  Let Elliot give his idea about live in free life. Sounds damn good. My eldest just shared this video with me to her three days ago. I more than suspect, that this is the reason that he dropped out of school and this is the reason he is excited about making his own way in this world. An education cannot make you excited to make your way in this world.So, what does make you motivated? Usually it's desperation, food, benefits… All the trappings of society, of what Elliott calls the system. My oldest talks a lot about things you must do the things you need to do. Must is not a place you want to be. Must are things that you grit your teeth and bear. Need. Need is something a lot different. Need is when you have to do something, you are so driven to do something you cannot stop yourself from doing.  Our friend Elliott is living a life to live. God damn, I want to lead a life that I need to. I have no complaints, there is no reason to even pretend like I can. But I can want better. Like I told you John I'm not very good at the -9 to 0. I am not good at healing. But I am good and getting better. I guess if I was a baseball player, I would strike out if I get behind in the count. But if I can get ahead in the count.… Watch out. My batting average would be 600, 700... 800 when I am a head in the count. And I have to admit, I'm a head of the count at the moment.

He sings:

count your many blessings Them one by one count your many blessings see what God has done.

That little ditty is held with me since Sunday school.


So go listen to Elliott if you haven't so I can talk about it.

What do you love?

What do you love?

What do I love?

I've already scripted this out in my journal the day after I first watched Elliott's video. It took me two times to get all the way through it. That's almost 30 minutes. My teacher spans about as long as my desk. Regardless, when I finished the video I asked myself that question:

what I love?
Those easy to get started because I went to the dozen goals that keep for myself every day. Those are my goals. Those must be what I love. And it was about myself, my family, and learning.

Now I cannot make a business out of my family but I can make family my business. So I have a different approach with my family. But right now I'm talking more about the opportunities as a professional.

What do I love?

I love to learn. I don't care what it is. I have my favorites. I love to learn. I don't hang with things very long. But I love to learn. I have an innate curiosity. My oldest has the exact same mindset. That boy will look up something on Wikipedia and get lost down the rabbit hole for an hour reading one article after another article after another article just absorbing everything becomes across his mind. He loves to learn. His goal is to make a living by doing that. We share the same goal.

Speaking of my oldest, he is watching the New York Boston NBA playoffs and I hear a lot of hollering going on my curiosity is up I have to see was going on…


Well, Cheryl didn't get the spark. She thought what Elliott said is just common sense. That's actually a good thing. It's a good thing that she thinks it's common sense. It's a good thing that she sees something that should be obvious to everyone. I'm not saying the idea was totally new to me. I just like the way it Elliott said it. And… Elliott is a character that I can keep in my mind.

I love to learn.

Today I spent an hour gathering all kinds of things to read, things to learn.

A lot of books about science.
A lot of books about drawing.
A number of good fiction books to read. I love a good story.
Some music.
Self-help books. How to be happy how to be self disciplined. How to be organized. How to deal with difficult people. How to focus. How to meditate.
Other health books decides meditation. Cookbooks. Exercise books. Spiritual books.
More books that I can read in a month. Basic textbooks to study with my youngest. He will not be invited back to university next semester so we will go back to studying at home. In my opinion where studying belongs.


I love journaling with this dictation software, with the Dragon speak software. Like I said, I don't mind the errors. I think they're funny. The only reservation I have is that journaling on the web will be lost. It will not be as permanent as my written journals or the journals I keep in word processing files. Maybe I don't need to keep everything I write. Maybe I need to get over it. Maybe I need to do things because I love to do.
Because I love to do them.

So let's go a little deeper. Let me pull up one of those books. Let me read a little bit and I'll make comments to you.


Here are some of the science books that interested me, science magazine, scientific American, science and world history, geometry, microbiology,Laboratory and diagnostic tests, pesticides in the modern world, reality, principles of anatomy and physiology, science stories to teach critical thinking, the statistics for quality control chemistry lab, survey of mathematics, teaching general chemistry, and the basics of biology.

I think I may have overdone it on the self-help Chandra of books. Not Chandra, Chandra Chandra… Type of book.
No excuses the power self-discipline
change of life in seven days
critical thinking
flow the physiology of optimal experience
get up and do it!
How to be a genius your brain and how to train it
how to be a gentleman and timely guide to timeless manners
how to catch up. And lots of cool stuff guys used to know but forgot
how developers are concentration
how to make people like you in 90 seconds or less

now that I think about it, I really should go over and read some of those books that I passed on to you. That way those books would be handy if you are interested in them.

I'm a book quarter so sue me. At least digital books are not heavy.


It is 4 o'clock and I do not have time Virginia Journal. Time continue journaling. Time to continue journaling. Finally. I need to wash my ass and go grocery shopping. I have a brunch to cook in the morning. Cheryl has a high school friend coming over. A friend from high school. Trudy.



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