“Unless!” 
― Dr. Seuss, The Lorax

Howdy! Unless your John, this site is not going to mean much to you. Even if you are the John this is written for, this site might not  mean much to you. This is my unique/feeble attempt to reach out to a friend in need.

Why a blog? Because I haven't see you in twenty something years.  We only knew each other for a couple of years in graduate school.  Friends to be sure.  However the friendship as faded over the years.  Wouldn't it be grand if this was the start of another chapter for us?

You, my friend, are up shit creek.
Not much I, or anybody else, can do for you.
Depression is a black hole you fall into alone.
Timmy? Timmy, is that you down that well?

“Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot,
Nothing is going to get better. It's not.” 
― Dr. Seuss, The Lorax

Head has been texting you back and forth from where ever you are in Arizona.  Her advice is genuine for her. She relies on God for a lot.  Me and the Boys roll our eyes because she always has a Christian station playing on the radio.  It's who Head is.  Me?  Not so much.  I have latched onto the scripture about praying in private and getting your rewards in private.  I am a creature of habit.  I recite my version of the Lord's Prayer every morning while I drip dry after my shower. Yep, every Monday thru Friday.  Today is Saturday and I said a prayer for you after my shower.

Lord (I said),
Let My Friend John know your close by leading him to where he needs to be...or not be. Amen.


Head has been asking me to text you. Don't know what I'd say.  A text is so ...concise.  I'm just starting to blog so I put one thing with the other and decided to make a blog especially for you. Your welcome.  Really, it's for me.  I feel obliged to reach out and this is my first step.

I thought about you when I woke up in the night, pissed at my boss.  I haven't always had a boss to work for.  I worked for myself for years and years.  I didn't think I'd last the five years I have so far.  We had words Friday at quitting time and I couldn't get those words out of my head.  No matter how I tried to think of something else, I couldn't shift my inner dialog.  Eventually I did by thinking about you and how you can't control your thoughts either.  I'm thinking that's what depression is like, I don't really know.

I now depression is real.  My dad was mentally gimped when he lost half his retirement in the Dot-Com crash.  He has plenty of cash, but it made him a different person to loose so much...obviously he liked the money a lot. And just this last week, our oldest boy said he thinks he is having some depression issues and he dropped all but one class and is dealing with it.  He is now taking Zoloft and working on some Behavior Adjustment (BA).

I want you to think about starting all over again.  One brick at a time.  Starting over.  From what I've heard, there is nothing for you to go back to.  All that baggage got you where you are today.  So, think about starting all over again. Things just might turn out different.  Can't be any worse.

Now, this blog is for you and if someone eavesdrops  I don't give two shits.  If you never read it, well, that would be too bad.  If you decide to check out, I plan on keeping the blog going as a memorial.  It's less tacky than those Jesus Lotto candles and a crucifix some folks have  in a corner of the living room.


“It's not about what it is, it's about what it can become.” 
― Dr. Seuss, The Lorax